It’s the time of the year for lists, so here are my picks for the top 7 items on this site from 2007. READ ON!
#7 - Bald Girdy
Yes, Jeff thought it was a little uncalled for (seeing as he isn’t actually this hairless), but it still puts a smile on my face. And really, that’s the goal of everything I do here: to make people smile and to make myself look like the double-fudge sundae eating moron that I am!
#6 - GMA 2005 1/2 - Back to Get My Load
This is the 10-minute epic culmination of a long drinking session (that I unfortunately missed) from late 2005. This is one of nine videos that came out of that night and is definitely one of the most enjoyed. I took great pleasure working on it as it’s a wonderful showcase of the insanity of the people I call friends!
#5 - The Beer Guy saga
On Wednesday, May 2nd, I made first contact with a dude transporting a full 2-4 of beer on his bike. You remember, the guy who was “so concerned about the safety of the beer that he rarely lifted his head to see where he was steering.” Yeah, he was awesome. In the end, I did kinda resent him and his presumed wife and concluded my post with, “I hope they both fall into a hole full of angry beavers with switchblades for arms.”
So this story grew a little more awesome when I spotted the dude again on May 25th. This time I made good use of my camera phone and captured him in all his glory.
But it didn’t end there. BMac, a friend of Jeff’s, captured a late Summer appearance of what was either the same dude or a close friend and snapped yet another photo. Forensic analysis of the photos would suggest it’s the same guy, but it makes little sense that he would have upgraded from Lucky to Blue.
Hope this poor bastard has a backup plan for the Winter months. Probably takes a cab to the Beer Store. But cabs cost money. He’ll have to put in some overtime at the cheese factory where he tops the Employees Most Likely to Come in on a Day off and Open Fire list.
#4 - Shitty Pete
A touching tale that really can’t be recapped, so here it is again in its entirety:
One day I was eating marshmallows from a garbage pail when out of one of the mallows crawled a house centipede. In the past I’d always erased these critters quickly, but I’d just gotten over a nasty bout of food poisoning and his charismatic gaze melted my weakened heart. It told me the story of a snowy December afternoon when it watched Back to the Future for the first time. Mischievous little guy had snuck into the theatre where he cozied up to a fat man’s Kodiak and fired up a Dunhill. I asked him if he shared my feelings that BTTF was one of the best movies of all time. He said he couldn’t agree more and we shared a smile.
I called the little guy Gerald, though he insisted I call him Shitty Pete. We ate pizza together that night and watched 20/20 starring a young John Stossel. They were doing a story about breast cancer that really seemed to touch Gerald. I shut off the TV and poured us both some hot tea. Wouldn’t you know it, we didn’t stop talking and giggling ’till dawn.
As the opening theme to Regis and Kelly ramped up, I looked over to see Gerald had fallen asleep. He sure was tired.
I don’t remember how that day ended, only that as he left he patted my back and wished me well. He said we’d meet again, though we never did.
Gerald: It was real.
And the enchanting music that accompanied it:
#3 - Beth wins the Women’s title
It’s not too often that any of us accomplish, well, anything, so this really was quite awesome:
#2 - Knocked Up
This is certainly the best news since the introduction of peanut butter and jam in the same jar!
#1 - THE EPIC
It’s what got the whole site started back up again! Technically this was December 31st, 2006, but what the fuck you gonna do about it?!
Hope you all have a wild New Year’s and we’ll continue the retardation in 2008!!