Sam and Kevin’s wedding was yesterday. Reception was terrific. Saw people I hadn’t seen in 15 years. Lots of great food and plenty of booze. Photo gallery coming soon.

Highlights:

  • Luc and Mike performing an awesome acoustic rendition of Lost Together
  • Sean Ball – no man has had this good an evening without being able to open his eyes
  • Vince the bartender – your rye and ginger’s changed my life
  • Maria’s Catering – when you put sausage next to meatballs, I’m not gonna get excited about the sausage; when you make that sausage maple flavoured I want to have sex with your face
  • Dan Potyok travelling the longest distance to be there and despite my line of questions about his kill count, he decides not to remove my spine and shove it up my ass
  • ten minutes into catching up with Rob Sykes he ends our chat abruptly when he realizes he’s missing out on some killer weed in the parking lot

When all was said and done it was about 2:30 in the morning and Adam G offered to drive me home. I remember getting home and getting out of the car and that’s about it. Analyzing the whereabouts of my clothing and several other items, I think I can piece together what took place.

beamweddingforensic

I’m figuring when I got there I was thirsty. I took two bottles of water from the fridge and placed them on the counter. I then turned around, took off my belt, tie and jacked and threw them onto the stairs. Turning back, I forgot about the bottles of water and poured myself a glass. I went to the office and briefly looked at Asian porn on the computer and removed my shirt while doing so (of course). I then went to the living room where I removed my glasses and fell asleep. About two hours later I woke up and stumbled to the stairs, picking up my jacket and heading up to the bedroom where I threw it down on the ground with my pants. Case closed.

I never like losing time when I’m boozing, but I really must say that I’m thrilled that I didn’t discover piss in the bed or a mound of shit in the living room. The absence of both allows me to give an approving thumbs up to the past 24 hours of my life.

God Bless.