Oh, hey. How ya been? Oh. Oh dear. Pretty terrible, eh? Well, I’m back. Ladies, get your pants down and gents, get your pants way down ‘cuz this is happening… for a short while until I retreat into the sad, wretched jungle of my mind. :D (inappropriate emoji’s rock!)
So, it looks like they’re finally getting around to fixing up Dominion Road. You know, Dominion Road. For those times when there’s a chance the Garrison will be peppered with cops and you’ve had eight too many beers and need to leave the Girdlestone mansion wherever you may be. Fear not ‘cuz the D’s got your back. Joyfully pinball your rust-roofed Corolla car off the former Home Hardware, former Braun’s Suprette and former Kelly’s Auto as you take your left turn, s-curve, slight left, hard left and wide right journey home.
Dominion Road at Chapin Parkway.
That stretch of the road brings back some memories. It was near that spot during my long walk home from a Ridgeway ditch after the Girdy wedding that I discovered I was mostly covered in vomit and my pants had been attacked by a cougar, or so their appearance would suggest. Nonetheless, I made it home with a little help from Mama C. Shout out to her for driving up to me near Crescent Road and without a hint of curiosity about why I was in that place and condition at such an early hour, she offered me a ride home. She’s a hip, hip lady.
Put another notch in the birthday belt today. Started with a chirping smoke alarm at 2 am. Dead batteries. Five years old so I can’t fault them, but I will, for bad timing if nothing else. Some post-breakfast Christmas shopping, because if you hate shopping on a regular day, why not do it on your birthday? Late lunch at Subway where they didn’t have Italian Herb & Cheese bread or sliced American cheese. They did have shitty hearing though and gave me a 12-inch sub when I asked for a 6. I let it slide. Maybe they knew better than me how many inches I needed. Short while later some Lee’s for dinner where I hugged an employee who didn’t want it. Back home and ate 3 Twinkies. Only 5 more to go in the box. It’s not a competition, someone reasonable might say, moments before I win first place.